Being a parent can feel so overwhelming. How can we possibly do all we are “supposed” to do?
When you have kids, you don’t have time to get all the things done today. You just don’t. The only way to “do it all” is a little at a time, as the season for it comes up.
The Bible tells us, “To everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose under the heaven.” (Eccl 3:1) I think this is very true in parenting.
There’s the time of their birth, and a time they leave home; a time to teach them, and a time to see what they’ve learned;
A time they are sick, and a time they are well; a time for meltdowns, and a time for courage;
A time to correct them, and a time to laugh with them; a time to put them to bed, and a time to dance with them;
A time to clean the house, and a time to leave the mess; a time to cuddle with them, and a time to give them space;
A time to give them gifts, and a time to donate toys; a time to be frustrated, and a time to be filled with joy.
To make the most of our seasons, and do “everything,” we should be careful with the time we have some control over.
Make a Flexible Routine
To help you get things done with kids, make a plan for a daily routine. This plan should include the most important things to meet the needs of your family: eating, sleeping, working, playing, learning, etc. This plan should have room for the random things that come up in life. Scheduling every minute will only mean pressure that doesn’t need to be there.
Our Routine
This is a typical Wednesday for us in this past year. The meals and sleep are the things that really stay consistent all week. I’ve built my routine around the one I’ve made for my kids. Notice that there are some unscheduled minutes in there. Those are important for our sanity.
| Wednsday Routine | The Kids | Me |
| 6:30-8 | Wake up, get ready for school | Get up, eat, get myself ready, see off my big kids and help littles get ready |
| 9am | start homeschool | start homeschool |
| 11:30-1 | make lunch, eat, clean up, play | make lunch, eat, clean up |
| 1-2 pm | more school | more school |
| 2-2:30pm | chores | chores |
| 2:30-3:30 | screen time | work, play, or rest |
| 3:30-5:30ish | play | work, play, take care of kids, make dinner |
| 5:30ish | family dinner, scripture, and clean up | family dinner, scripture, and clean up |
| 6:30 -7:45 | screen time | plan for Thursday homeschool, spend time with hubby |
| 8pm | get a snack and go upstairs | help get bedtime snacks, herd littles upstairs |
| 9pm | Family prayer, littles go to bed | family prayer, take littles to bed |
| 10ish | sleep | hang out with teens for a few minutes, then go to bed |
Important Things on a To-Do List
With our basic needs being met in our routine, we can make daily goals for other important things. Making a simple to-do list each day is something I’ve found very helpful in running my household. And it feels really good to go back and check things off to see I got something done! But I have to keep it simple because we already have the routine, and I know other things will come up.
When I’ve had a new baby, my to-do list would have things like; read my scriptures, nurse the baby, bathe the toddler, do the dishes, and hold my husband’s hand. They were simple but important goals for the day.
At this stage, when our baby is 4 years old, some of those things are easy to get to without writing them down, like dishes and scriptures, so I can have different things on my to-do list than I used to. I also write things I need to remember that my big kids are doing that day. This is my list today.
Your list should feel doable for your season. If it feels stressful, simplify it.
Ideas for a Fresh Start
When life feels overwhelming, stop to think about what might need to change. Here are some things I do when I feel too stuck in the details of running my household.
Strive for Balance
In “The Yes Brain,” by Daniel J. Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson, one thingsI love is the idea of a “Healthy Mind Platter,” which says that there are types of activities our minds need every day in order to stay healthy. (Siegel and Bryson pgs 65-66) I’m not perfect at balancing my time, but when I feel unsatisfied with life, I go back to this idea it helps me see what I’m needing and find my smile again.
Get some Fresh Air
I’ve heard that stepping on dirt physically grounds our bodies, and that just seeing the green on plants makes people feel more calm. There is fresh oxygen from the plants outside that our bodies need. There’s also vitamin D that so many people aren’t getting enough of that comes freely from the sunshine. And the little ones always find something fascinating out there. Going outside can help clear your mind.
Pause and Pray
One thing I’ve done for several years now is to pause sometimes in my day and think, and maybe pray, “What do I need to do right now?” It never takes long before a thought comes to mind, and I usually know right away if there’s one thing that’s most important. At any given moment I could be needing to do something to run my household, take care of myself, take care of my family, or help someone else. But every time I pause and pray, I feel like it gets me on the right track.
Just Be With Your Kids
In “The Gift of a Happy Mother,” by Rebecca Eanes, the thing I needed most was the idea of making time to just be with our kids every day. Most parents looked forward to having kids, but life can get in the way of us really enjoying this stage of their lives if we aren’t paying attention. This is the season to look at their cute faces, to smile and laugh with them, and hear what’s on their little minds. Making time to just be with them is a simple and beautiful way to enjoy our parenting adventures.
Thanks for reading my post.
For more thoughts see Changing Seasons.
