Weaning your baby from breastfeeding is bittersweet. Of all our ten babies, the last time I breastfed our #7 stands out in my memory. He was almost 18 months old. We had been slowly cutting back on feedings and I was feeling like it was time to be done. I was on the porch swing in the back yard and he got on my lap wanting me to nurse him. I pulled him close and latched him on. Sweet little boy…
There are two big steps of weaning that I’ll be talking about today. One is the first step – when babies start on solid foods. The other is the last step – when they are done with breastfeeding. I’ll also give a summary of how I handled it from the starting solids to the end of weaning.
When to start weaning – starting on solids
In this post, weaning is the process of changing your baby’s diet from breastmilk to the foods they’ll be eating the rest of their lives. When I had my first babies, I had read that you should start giving your babies solids at 4 months. When I was nursing my last babies I read that 6 months was the right age. What made more sense to me than a certain age mark, was looking for signs that they are ready to start solids. Here’s what to watch for to know if your baby is ready.
Able to sit up
Before a baby starts on solids, they should be able to at least sit up assisted. If you set your baby in a high chair and they tip over, they aren’t ready to be there.
No more tongue thrust
Have you ever tried to give a baby a bite of something, and their little tongue pushes it right out of their mouth? That is called the tongue thrust reflex. If your baby’s first bite of solids get pushed right out with their tongue, they aren’t ready to start solids.
A pincer grab
If you’ve watched a baby developing, you’ve noticed them practicing grabbing things. For a while they grab things with their whole fist. Then they start trying to grab things with their thumb and fingertip. That is called a pincer grab, and it is a good sign that they’re ready to start on solids.
They want a bite
Does your baby stare at your food while you’re eating? Maybe they imitate you chewing, or open their mouth when you pick up your forkful. Some babies will even reach out and grab whatever food they can reach! These are good signs that your baby is ready to start weaning by starting on solids.
The Last Step of Weaning
When to end breastfeeding
When to end breastfeeding is a very personal decision, and will probably be different for with each baby. My first baby was weaned at 9 months because of a difficult miscarriage. My last one was weaned at 2 1/2 years because she was my last and there was no reason to end earlier.
Looking back, I feel like the age that our babies had the easiest weaning transition was between 15 and 18 months. There’s a change that takes place in those months where your baby goes from looking like a baby to looking like a toddler. In my mind that connects with them being more interested in toddler ways and less interested in baby ways. Younger than that they still felt the need to be babied, and older than that they paid more attetion to the change. But during that window, they didn’t seem to notice weaning very much.
How to handle it
Whenever it is right for you and your baby, weaning gradually will make a less traumatic transition for bodies and emotions. Here are some ideas for how to go about the last part of weaning.
If they ask for it
One gentle method of weaning is to only nurse when baby shows they’re interested. This works good if you are not in any hurry to be done, but you’re feeling like they’re old enough to be cutting back. With this method you don’t offer to breastfeed them, but you don’t refuse if they ask for it.
Distract them
It might work for your baby to interest them in something else when they want to breastfeed but you’re trying to wean them. I never used that method with weaning, but I used it plenty of times to get my little ones out of trouble that they were enjoying. A favorite toy, a walk outside, or a story book would usually be good distractions.
Put it off
This is one I used for nighttime weaning. When they woke up ready to nurse in the night, I would dance them for 5 minutes. Sometimes they’d go back to sleep, and sometimes they still wanted to nurse. But by doing putting it off consistently, I was able to push back the time further and further until they stopped expecting to be breastfed at night. The same idea could be used during the day.
Choose a place
I used this one to finish weaning our last baby. When we were getting further along with nursing I decided to only breastfeed her at home. When I was ready to cut back again, I picked one chair upstairs and one downstairs that were our breastfeeding spots. Then it was down to just the downstairs chair. In the end, I hid the nursing pillow, because I knew that just seeing it would remind her.
How I went about it
When I was ready to start weaning, I’d give them a baby safe solid once a day during a meal, then nurse them till their tummy was full. After a month or so, I’d add in another meal each day. Over time they learned better how to eat solids and didn’t need to nurse after their solid meal. One of the first meals was always dinner, because they loved being able to eat while we all ate together.
I would pay close attention to my body when baby was nursing more. I wanted to keep myself in balance. If I got to feeling like too much of my energy was going toward breastfeeding, I would add another solid meal to their day.
Whenever I felt the need to be done with breastfeeding one of our babies, I would simply replace a feeding with a snack at a certain time of day. After about a week, I’d replace another feeding. It went on like that until we were done weaning. It was always bitter sweet.
At this point in my life, I’m really enjoying having my hands more free than they were for years. But sometimes I miss that sweet satisfying snuggle of breastfeeding my baby.
Thanks for reading my post. I hope you’re enjoying your adventure.
